BBAW short lists were unveiled this week. As I watch people express their excitement at being part of the short lists, or search my own feelings at not being included, I can’t help but wonder at this weird and wonderful thing called blogging. We say we do it for ourselves, yet we all admit that we love comments and notes from others. Similarly, I write from the heart but cannot help but try to figure out what I did wrong to not be included among the Most Well-Written or Best Eclectic Blogs short lists. If I blog for myself, would I truly care whether I receive attention from others? In this day and age, is blogging really only for one’s self?
If I am going to be honest with myself, I started blogging because it sounded like fun, and I was enticed by the idea of receiving review copies of novels. I’m a book lover. Free books has me practically drooling. I made some decisions relatively early on in blogging that prevented me from growing my readership by leaps and bounds, as compared to other new bloggers, but I received comments and support from friends and received the occasional review copy and was happy. Yes, I would look at my stats, watch others talk about theirs and question whether I made the right decision. I stand by my decisions not to do certain things that would guarantee more followers, but there are days where I lament my low readership.
On a similar vein, I write from my heart and not to please my readers. Yet, I cannot help but feel disappointed that I was not voted into the short list. Judging by some of the reactions, others who are included on the list are equivalently happy. Again, if we were writing for ourselves, then it shouldn’t matter.
Because it all matters – comments, followers, peer recognition, author/publisher recognition and relationships – I have to conclude that we aren’t writing for ourselves. Yes, it may be a hobby, but we ALL want the recognition and accolades that come with doing something into which we pour our heart and soul. If we were only writing for ourselves, we would mark our blogs as private and make our words available to a chosen few. The fact that we have gone public with our thoughts, our secrets, and other items about which we write is proof that we inadvertently seek approval from others, whether it is via a comment, a review book, an e-mail from an author, an award, or some other form of attention from someone else that makes us feel good about our blogging.
After thinking about this, it is time to stop hiding behind the idea that I am putting forth all this effort and energy into something that I am doing solely for myself. I will confess that I am not blogging just for myself. I want the recognition and prestige I feel when I form a relationship with a publicist or publisher. I seriously jump up and down when I get review books and ARCs. I would love to turn writing my blog into a paid career and have taken steps to start building a professional portfolio to do just that. I was hoping that peer recognition in the form of the BBAW awards would help set me apart from others and could be something I would use in my portfolio. While I am not willing to employ certain gimmicks designed to build followers, the loss of followers I had after I switched domain names upset me horribly. While blogging is still a hobby, it has become something I value and place among the higher priorities of my life. I hope to be recognized for my efforts and tend to get down on myself when I do not receive a comment on one of my posts. Selfish? Maybe. The truth? Absolutely.
**********************************************************************************
Thoughts? Dig deep and tell me the truth behind the reasons why you blog. You may just surprise yourself.
Thank you so much, Care! I am so glad you didn't give up and kept trying to post comments. I love ID, but sometimes it is just as much of a pain as Blogger comments. LOL!
BBAW is intimidating. I feel such pressure to follow everyone and then feel bad because I cannot leave comments on them all. I really only leave comments consistently on the same blogs because I know them and love their work. It is such a huge community, and I love seeing it grow, and sometimes, we just need to keep doing our own thing and not give in to pressure.
You'll get your mojo back as long as you remember why you started in the first place and not worry too much about visiting everyone. I love your posts but can understand and appreciate silence too.
That makes a lot of sense. I will definitely have to update my review policy to state these goals. I'd like to mention these goals during BBAW too. Thanks for helping!
Danielle – that was exactly why I was upset. We have all put a lot of time and effort into each of our blogs, and recognition for our hard work is always appreciated.
Community, helping other parents, sharing – those are all great reasons for blogging. Thanks for your honesty!
It does feel a bit like a popularity contest only because it is so much easier to put more favor on those blogs one already reads versus those that may be new. I do like the idea of not judging your own category.
Sometimes, no matter how much advanced notice one can give, people will still ignore it. The followers will come back. Unfortunately, it's going to take some time. If I write well, they will come!
I agree with Jen your change in domain name probably did hurt you this year. I also think in addition to be honest with yourself about your blog purpose it is important to write about your goals. It is not a gimmick to let others know you’d like to turn blogging into a paid career. You never know who may be reading and what connections they may have.
It’s like what my friend Wendi told me, “I can’t help you find a new job, if I don’t know you are looking.”
My recent post A brief interlude during unsettling times
Thanks, Lisa! The followers will come back someday. If not, they weren't the type of followers I wanted in the first place. LOL!
This is my first year participating in BBAW at the nomination level. It is an interesting process about which I remain undecided. I'm not certain you can ever remove the popularity portion of the selection process, as time and name recognition can be a powerful motivator.
Comments are tricky, aren't they? We all want them but find it so difficult to leave them for others. I am so ashamed that I do not leave more comments for others since they are so precious.
I understand your reasons for starting your blog. It's the reason I joined my book club – I had never before found anyone with whom to discuss my beloved classics. The blogging awards are tricky. They are a form of peer recognition, which is always prized, but can be a form of bragging in the wrong hands. I am torn about them.
Good luck building up your blog! It's a slow but worthwhile process!
I think a majority of bloggers do use their blog as a form of reading journal but with ulterior motives – like book recommendations, review copies, or general discussions. The best part is that there isn't anything wrong with that!
No post 5 times! It looks like it went through perfectly!
I agree that the eclectic category was TOO big. The time to go through all of those posts was ridiculous, but you had to do it to be fair to your fellow nominees. It's a crazy process.
I can't specialize. You know what I read. It's all over the place, and I like that. I cannot stay with one genre for too long or else I get bored. I may write my blog for others but what I read is for myself.
Why, do you think, that so many people state otherwise? They still insist that they don't care about the comments and the followers and only blog for themselves?
The subscribers on FeedBurner are coming back. The number of followers is still low, but time heals all wounds. I knew I was going to take a hit, but it is still frustrating since I was building such great momentum prior to the switch. If I can do it once, I can do it again!
Thanks, Amy, for your support! I would love to be able to force people to read my posts. LOL! I put a lot of heart and soul into each of my reviews and feel that they are worth the attention. That being said, I never will understand what excites people and what doesn't. All I can hope to do is keep writing well and hope that it will garner the attention I feel it deserves.
I agree that a core group of commenters who provide more food for thought is definitely more important than a lot of simple comments that don't add to a discussion. I can't help but feel torn that any comment is better than none though.
Being true to oneself is the most important lesson a blogger can learn, IMO. Ultimately, you will not face the blogger burn-out so many others face. Thank you so much for your kind words! Comments like yours definitely keep me blogging!
I am having a real hard time with your comment thingy…hope I didn't post like 5 times 😀 Haha.
My recent post Readers Imbibing Peril V Challenge
I freely admit that I started my blog mostly for the community. I blogged for a long time previously, but eventually I had nothing to say anymore.
Books give me something to talk about…and even if I'm only getting a few comments, it keeps me accountable for making an effort to read rather than stare at the TV. I like getting book recommendations from other bloggers too 🙂
It's partially for myself, but partially because I like to talk with other people about books.
You're totally right that we blog for more than just ourselves. A blog that is just for yourself is just a diary, really.
I wouldn't be surprised if your domain name change and the time it can take people to sort that out and recognize the new name as you may be part of the reason that you didn't make the short lists this year, but that's okay, because there is always next year. I promise the followers come back, it can just take some time. I had a lot of subscribers that I lost when moving from wordpress.com to self-hosted and putting my feed through Feedburner. It was frustrating for a long time, but as I've kept working over the last couple of years, I couldn't have imagined the steady traffic I get now (and I get nothing like some people).
My recent post The Gendarme by Mark Mustian – Book Review
What a great post Michelle. I think you have it so right. We do blog for more than ourselves. I always kind of wonder about stats and why they stay low and why some posts receive almost no comments (of books I was super excited about) and others receive lots (well, lots for me, not lots compared to most bloggers maybe, heh, and these often on books that I was only meh about). Don't you wish you could say listen people THIS is the book you want – come read THIS post!
Anyway, I feel liked I kind of lucked in to the Best New Blog shortlist because I've been around long enough to have some followers and there are less people going for it. The actual categories (I was in eclectic too), was disappointing but I can only hope maybe next year. I started blogging because I wanted to chat about books. None of my real life friends or family read the books I do so I wanted to be able to discuss all these books I was reading and find new great books. Wanting that discussion means that I want comments. Doesn't always happen, but sometimes it does and that is a lot of fun. The other side is that I'd much rather have a core group of great people to chat with then a lot of blah comments!
I think you have to stick to what makes you happiest and what you think is right for you else even if you do get more followers you'll only feel meh about your blog instead of loving it. I love your blog, and sometimes lurk more than I should and not comment as much as I want to, but I think you deserve an award 🙂 That is awesome that you are making a professional portfolio and I wish you best of luck with writing as a career!
My recent post Review- I’ll Get There It Better Be Worth The Trip by John Donovan